A few musician jokes…
If you’ve heard’m ignore’m, if not, enjoy 🙂
And oh…none of these jokes reflect my personal opinions…
Q: What is the difference between a dead trombone player and a dead snake in the middle of the road?
A: The snake was on his way to a gig.
Q: How do you get a guitar player to turn down?
A: Put sheet music in front of him.
Q: What band name on a marquee will always guarantee a crowd?
A: Free Beer
Q: What is the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
A: With a drum machine, you only have to punch in the information once.
Q: What is the difference between a singer and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
Q: How can you tell if a stage is level?
A: The bass player is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.
Q: What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians?
A: A guitar player.
Q: What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?
Q: Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car?
A: It took two hours to get the drummer out!
Q: Why did God give drummers 10% more brains than horses?
A: So they would not crap during the parade.
Q: What is the difference between a viola and an onion?
A: Nobody cries when you chop a viola.
Q: What is the difference between a bull and an orchestra?
A: An orchestra has the horns in the back and the ass in the front.